Fathers Eve, the annual event for dads to celebrate each other with each other, is back in 2022. However, its founder wants to add a new twist: community engagement and family participation.

Event founder John Francis said he wants those planning the pre-Father’s Day celebrations to add a local service project to their parties. These should be something that family members, friends and neighbors can participate in.

“It can be as simple a taking a garbage bag in hand and picking up trash,” Francis said in an interview. “While your out doing it, talk to people about doing good. It doesn’t have to be an expansive or complicated project to accomplish the goal.”

For example, members, families and friends of Minnesota’s Twin Cities Dads Group, which he is a part of, are helping rehabilitating a playground the afternoon of June 18. Later, they will head to a nearby brewery for the traditional toast for fatherhood on the night before Father’s Day.

“Most dads want to do the right thing when given the opportunity to,” he said. “We hope to encourage this and share this with our wives, children, friends and community. This way we expand into something bigger and better.”

One group the organization hopes to attract is father figures, even if they are not dads themselves. After reading stories about the problems of children who grew up fatherless, Francis began thinking about getting other men involved with Fathers Eve through community projects. He hopes their actions could help create a “showcase” of inspiring male role models for others, especially children.

Charity component dropped

Fathers Eve started in 2012. Francis invited several dad friends to his house for beers, billiards and swapping stories about fatherhood. The hope: support for each other in effort to become better parents. Over the years, scores of celebrations have been held annually in backyards and businesses across the United States and a few internationally locations.

“Gathering the night before Father’s Day gives dads a chance to spend time with each other to focus on sharing ideas, supporting what it means to be better dads, making stronger connections, all while doing something good for the community,” the father of two told City Dads back in 2017.

Fathers Eve previous encouraged event organizers to include a charity component that assists a parenting or children’s cause. However, fundraising for others proved to be difficult.

“We don’t want to be just another charity organization. We want to be role models for family and community,” Francis said in explaining the shift.

Where to celebrate Fathers Eve 2022

Several City Dads chapters will be among those hosting Fathers Eve 2022 events (click city to find event listing and RSVP) :

• Charlotte, N.C.
• Chicago
• Cincinnati
• Denver
• Kansas City, Mo.
• Minneapolis/St. Paul, Minn. – Twin Cities
• New York City – Harlem and Port Washington
• Orlando

(DISCLOSURE: City Dads Group is a national sponsor for Fathers Eve 2022.)

A complete listing of Fathers Eve 2022 events can be found on its website.

If you can’t attend an event, don’t despair. An online live streaming of celebrations will take place on Zoom and Facebook Live.

A live stream replaced in-person events in 2020 because of the COVID-19 pandemic, and supplemented last year’s celebrations. In 2022, it will be simplified to mostly a brief welcome and countdown, Francis said.

The countdowns to the annual celebratory toast will start shortly before the start of 8 p.m. in each U.S. time zone, starting with Eastern time, on June 18. You can sign up for the live stream to share at your event or watch individually.

Our much-acclaimed Modern Dads Podcast returns Feb. 25 with a new season of episodes covering issues today’s fathers face navigating work, parenthood, relationships and play. If you have a thirst for dad podcasts right this minute, here are a few we think you should check out:

The Art of Fatherhood

Art Eddy knows dad podcasts. He’s produced or hosted them for the Life of Dad social network for years, including the Art of Conversation that focuses on writers who are fathers. His baby these days is the Art of Fatherhood. Here interviews dads from the worlds of entertainment, music and sports about their latest projects and … being a dad, duh! Recent guests have included comedic actor Bobby Moynihan (Saturday Night Live, Mr. Mayor), pro football Hall of Famer Anthony Munoz, actor Jaleel White (Family Matters) and musician Josh Abbot.

Black Fathers, NOW!

City Dads Group contributor Mike Dorsey is an author, business entrepreneur, community organizer, speaker and — yes — podcaster. Dorsey aims to redefine and uplift the image of African American dads through inspiring discussions with engaged black fathers. Dorsey will be a guest host on the Modern Dads Podcast this season, interviewing venture capitalist Erik Moore.

Charlotte Dads Group Podcast

This podcast by the leaders of one of our most active City Dads chapters kicked off its second season this past autumn. So far they’ve already had a guest expert talking about the secrets of making great barbeque, serious discussions about overcoming one’s parental fears, and doled out advice on making your child’s nighttime routine easier on the both of you. The Charlotte Dads will appear on Modern Dads Podcast to discuss hobbies they share with their kids.

Dad House

This recently launched podcast features City Dads Group contributor Shannon Carpenter and four of his at-home father friends. They yuck it up on any and everything, such as their initial episode’s debate of SUVs vs. minivans. They promise to also take on serious subjects as they plumb their experience raising a combined 16 children in the heart of the Midwest.

The #FatherhoodIsLit Podcast

NYC Dads Group co-organizer (and City Dads blog contributor) James Lopez hosts a self-described “raw and unfiltered” dad podcast that talks about hip hop, the stock market, dealing with life trauma and even making cash by reselling your kids old stuff. Lopez will be a guest host on the Modern Dads Podcast this season, interviewing opera singer Kenneth Kellogg.

The NOMADad Podcast

Brock Lusch, the founder of our Cincinnati Dads Group, started his podcast (an acronym for “Not on My Ass Dad”) in 2018 to share “impactful stories of life experiences, hobbies and those moments that are viral worthy but may only be heard in person or on this show.” In addition to interviewing authors and experts, he’s mined more than a few everyday nuggets such as the father who leads his daughter’s Girl Scout troop. Lusch will be a guest host on the Modern Dads Podcast this season, interviewing children’s book author Vernon Gibbs II.

Dad podcasts photo: © Guillem de Balanzó / Adobe Stock.

All the dads of my group gather around as one pulls out his wallet. His smile is huge and, even though he would never admit it, there is a tear in his eye as he pulls out the little photograph.

“That’s just precious,” one says.

“Hey, congrats man,” another says.

The picture is well-worn, and you can tell that he has shown it hundreds of times in the last two days alone. To his parents, his friends, even to strangers on the street. He can’t help himself because none of us can. He’s trying to be humble but there is pride in his voice every time he talks about her.

“It was a rough go there for a bit, and I was scared,” he tells the guys.  “It could have gone either way.” The stress of the last year is evident as his shoulders appear more rounded than they had been before. “But it worked out. And just look at her. Beautiful.”

All the guys agree, and then start getting their wallets out of their back pockets. We can’t help it. We all have pictures to share.

“This baby right here,” someone chimes in, “she’s gonna be amazing.”

“How much longer?”

“A couple of weeks unless something goes wrong.”

I put my hand on his shoulder to offer support.

“How many gallons?” I ask.

“50. Think it will be enough?” he says.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

The dad who showed his picture first puts it back in his wallet. Everyone pats him on the back, and we all talk about the next steps. Geothermal model? Maybe have twins, one tank to hold a reserve for the other. There’s a lot to choose from when it comes to a quality water heater.

I know this because my dad’s group has been talking about them for freaking years.

Water heaters. Really?

Yes, really.

I would like to say that as dads, we are better than this. We are not the cliches that we have been portrayed as. And yet, we are.

What do dads talk about when they get together? Water heaters. How many BTUs, gallons and installation? Tank or no tank? Are you going to hire out the install or are we all getting together to bring this baby into the world together?

All. The. Time.

“Hey, guys,” I asked, “Maybe we cannot discuss water heaters today?”

They slashed my tires, and I’m close to being kicked out of the group.

These are the same families I’ve been quarantining with, and I’m considering going to a large concert to get the virus just to have something else to talk about. But no, I wouldn’t want to take attention away from the new water heater. That would be selfish.

We took a trip together last week and rented a house in the country away from the world. A beautiful barn-type structure that had three floors. The kids could play on the top one, the middle floor was for adults, and the basement was for the dual water heater system that the owner had dropped some serious coin on. I bet my wife how long each dad would hold off before he checked it out and then commented on the system.

I won the bet.

“Hey, did you see the water heater down in the basement?” asked the first dad. “She’s a beaut!”

“I sure did!” said another dad. “Reminds me of my own!”

“Really impressive. Quality install, too!” the third dad said.

The fourth dad just pulled out his wallet and they all gathered around once again, each touching the image of the now frayed photograph that came in the weekly mailer. My wife fell asleep mid-conversation. I tried to slip away but was punched repeatedly for not showing the proper respect.

Now, my dad’s group will say that I’m making up this whole story and adding a flair that didn’t happen. They’ll say that they don’t have a photograph and that they don’t talk about water heaters that much. That it’s just Shannon being funny and trying to give them crap for talking about water heaters so much.

My response?

Ask them about the water heater in the rental house, and I guarantee they will tell you the exact make and model, and how it was installed, and they will all look wistful while they do it.

As for me, a stupid water heater is a stupid water heater, and I don’t need any more information about them. We don’t have to be the cliche dads society expects us to be. We can talk about something else.

Like, for example, my new weed eater. She’s amazing. I got her on sale and when she hums, it’s the music of the gods. Here, let me show you a picture.

Photo: © Konstantin Kulikov / Adobe Stock.

I killed a thousand butterflies. It’s not my proudest moment. It happened right in front of my children, too. Not just my children, but 13 other children as well. Things could have gone better.

This past summer in Iowa, butterflies migrated right through the center of the state. It happened to coincide with my annual “dads’ trip.” This is the trip my dads’ group takes every year so we can build memories with our children. We pick a direction and go. We see the silliest of the silly. Large balls of twine or the world’s largest set of overalls. And this time, we killed at least 17% of the monarch butterfly population.

I didn’t much notice. I think that makes it worse.

Things did not go as planned on this trip. I mean, besides the butterfly massacre. Three days before we left, Penguin Books bought the rights to my at-home-dad book. It’s going to be a how-to book. It’s the culmination of a lifelong dream. When I got the call, I was over the moon.

The very next day, my brother-in-law died in a car accident.

Two days after that, I went on the dads’ trip.

It’s hard to explain the emotions I was going through at the moment. The book deal was magical. The death of a close friend was life-shattering. Can you be in your highest high while also being in your lowest low? Apparently, yes. The emotions battle each other like two prizefighters in an octagon ring. At rest stops, I was emailing my new editor about the title of my book. At the same time, I was emailing my wife about funeral arrangements. In between, the kids were staring at the butterflies in my car’s grill.

Breakdowns: mechanical and otherwise

The other dads on the trip knew what was going on. They are going to be a big part of the book because they are a big part of my life. The things we have done together is the basis for all my writing. I’m a better father because of them. They were simultaneously happy for me and sad for me, which pretty much described my mood.

I followed our convoy of minivans to our next destination. But, if I’m honest, I had no idea what that destination was. My mind was preoccupied, as one would expect. I was thinking next steps. I was worried about my children, which is why we still came on the trip. I wanted them to be around their friends. Between all of us in this group, we have 16 kids who have grown up together over the last 11 years. I wanted my kids to have support during this hard time. And I needed the support. Desperately.

Halfway through the trip, white smoke began coming out the back of my van. This was it. This was my breaking point. The anxiety attack I had threatened to overwhelm me. I was in the middle of rural Iowa which is famously known for not being near anything. Chest-high fields of corn and wheat surrounded us. I didn’t know what to do.

But I didn’t need to. I had a dads’ group.

Do you really want to know the unvarnished truth about what it’s like to have a dad’s group? What it really means? If I take away all the filters on men’s emotions, even the ones I put on my own, and speak plainly: It’s life-changing. That’s what it is. There is no better way to explain it than that. It’s joy and camaraderie. It’s having someone to lean on without having to ask. It’s guys that know absolutely what you mean when you absolutely can’t say it. There’s an understanding there that goes beyond words. It’s a look or a nod. It’s a feeling that they know what they mean to you even if the words won’t come.

Dads’ group to the rescue

“What the fuck am I going to do?” I asked at a two-pump gas station with my car caked in dead butterflies. “That’s it. I quit. I’ve got nothing left.” I was cackling. I wanted to punch something. I was losing it.

“Shut up. We’ve already got it figured out,” Jake said.

“Yup,” said Mike.

Larry already had my hood up. He was standing with Mick over the engine. Jake was getting a paper towel to check the oil.  They already had a plan to not only take care of my car, but my family. I don’t remember asking them for the plan, but apparently I didn’t need to.

At that moment, they took the weight of everything off me. The book, my brother-in-law, and the butterflies. This is what it means to be a part of a dad’s group. When you absolutely can’t lift anymore; they can.

For the rest of the trip, I was always bracketed by minivans. My oil was checked constantly. My kids were watched to free me up to deal with either the book or my extended family. I didn’t have to ask for either. It just happened. The trip went fine, and the minivan made it home. As it turns out, my very old minivan had engine sludge that caused the white smoke.  My dads got me home, and on the trip, gave me the sturdy shoulders to count on when I wasn’t sure I could even count on myself.

Even now, months later, it’s tough to write about this because I’m afraid of how I’ll be perceived sharing something so personal. In fact, I’ve written a dozen versions of this story and thrown them all out. Expressing emotion to other men is not something that comes naturally to me. Simply saying “thank you” to them feels inadequate, as if it doesn’t go far enough to truly say how I feel about them. I’m usually full of humor and laughs, a nice way to hide emotions while still expressing them. It’s uncomfortable doing it this way. It’s exposing.

It is necessary.

City Dads Group is all about empowering fatherhood. It’s a place to make connections, to learn, and to advocate for fathers. But it’s also about giving back to others what we have been given. It’s taking our experiences and handing them to the next set of guys who are involved fathers. We do this without being asked because we know. We absolutely know.

Here, I can truthfully answer the question: What does a dads’ group mean to me? This. This is what a dads’ group means, and I hope you are as lucky as I am.

You know Father’s Day is near when you see members of our City Dads Groups across the nation popping up all over your TV screens and social media feeds. And 2018 was no exception to the rule.

Our biggest appearance came on Father’s Day 2018 itself. City Dads Group co-founder Lance Somerfeld joined CBS Sunday Morning correspondent Mo Rocca on a segment discussing how the “dad look” is fashionably hip (as if we didn’t know).

He forgot to tell Rocca to — please — don’t believe the fanny pack hype. Or that dads would blow $1,000 on butt-ugly Gucci sneakers. We like our butt-ugly at bargain prices.

Father’s Day 2018 also saw the opening of Incredibles 2, which received some hype for superhero Mr. Incredible becoming a stay-at-home dad. That brought the media to our door. Several of our members, including NYC Dads Group member Andrew Bentley, are quoted in a story on Refinery29 about being real-life superheroes.

“Superheroes represent our aspirations, individually and collectively. They have the abilities we want. They have the ambition. The empathy. All of those things that they’re able to influence the world in ways that we would like,” Bentley says in the story. “So when we see Mr. Incredible take a step back and say, ‘I’m going to take care of this kid and allow my wife to go off and pursue her career,’ if he can do it, anyone can do it.”

A playground play date between two of our Dallas Dad Group members and their children is also used to illustrate the link between being an at-home father and a superhero. Way to save the day, Adam Hill and Trevor Stamp:

“There’s no manual or guide on how to be a parent,” Gutierrez is quoted as saying. “I think [this group] has taught me a lot about myself, and I realized that I had to make a lot of changes. I was very much focused on my career because that’s what society expected me to do. Now, being more open with a community that has supportive fathers and environments like the City Dads’ network, I’ve been able to find other dads out there trying to do the same thing. It’s OK not to be so focused on my career. I can be balanced on my career and family and travels and make my life what I want it to be.”

Brock Lusch, co-organizer of our Cincinnati Dads Group, had the lead quote in the Refinery29 story and then took the spotlight in a local TV news interview to discuss what our social and support network does for fathers.

Brandon Billinger and Tucker Smith of the Kansas City Dads Group did a similar interview for one of their local TV news programs.

Finally, Darrell Humphrey of Charlotte Dads Group dispelled some of the common misconceptions about fathers caring for their kids as well as promoting his chapter in a one-on-one with a local TV news anchor.

Pediatric cancer is in the sights of City Dads Group this June as we team with the Alex’s Lemonade Stand Foundation (ALSF) to raise money to help find a cure.

City Dads Group chapters in a dozen cities from coast-to-coast will set up stands between June 2 and 10 to sell lemonade and take donations to go to the national nonprofit’s work funding research to find better treatments and cures for childhood cancer.

Details, including times and locations for each group’s event this year, will be made available on the City Dads Group’s ALSF fundraising page or on the group’s Meetup page (see list below).

City Dads Group previously raised funds with Alex’s Lemonade Stand in 2016, but this year’s model should be even sweeter thanks to our ongoing partnership with Plum Organics. The nation’s leading organic baby food brand is helping our chapters out with supplies for their stands, and will provide snacks and samples for patrons.

• Boston – June 8
• Charlotte – June 4
• Chicago – June 9
• Dallas – June 9
• Fresno, Calif. – June 7
• Kansas City – June 2
• Los Angeles- June 10
• Madison, Wisc. – June 8
• New York City – June 5
• Portland, Ore. – June 9
• San Francisco – June 2
• Twin Cities (Minneapolis/St. Paul), Minn – June 2

City Dads Group and Plum Organics® will again work together to help nourish children and assist families in need on Giving Tuesday, an international day of helping others that follows Thanksgiving.

On Nov. 28, City Dads in 12 U.S. metropolitan areas will help pack and distribute food donated by Plum Organics, the nation’s leading organic baby food brand. Plum Organics last year for Giving Tuesday donated more than 24,000 meals to charitable organizations chosen by our chapters in Chicago, Dallas, Denver, Los Angeles, New York City, San Francisco and the Minneapolis/St. Paul.

** Watch video of our 2016 Giving Tuesday work **

“We are proud to expand our Giving Tuesday partnership with Plum Organics to support nonprofits that support families in need across the United States,” said Matt Schneider, co-founder of City Dads Group. “Our dads are very proud to be able to provide time and much needed food to our communities.”

Where we are helping on Giving Tuesday

Our members will help pack, stock and distribute the Plum Organics donation and perform other volunteer work to the following organizations:

• Boston/Providence Dads Group have chosen to assist the Rhode Island Community Food Bank, which will distribute the food through its 160 agency partners that reach 57,000 individuals monthly.
• The Charlotte Dads Group plans to work with Second Harvest Food Bank of Metrolina, which distributed more than 50 million pounds of food and household items throughout its 19 county service region during its most recent fiscal year.
• Chicago Dads Group will assist clients of Palatine Township Food Pantry, an organization that serves an average of 345 families each month.
• Dallas Dads Group has chosen to work with Hope Supply Co. which assists 1,100 homeless children in North Texas every day.
• The Fresno Dads Group will work with Community Food Bank, which serves more than 280,000 people each month through a variety of programs.
• Kansas City Dads Group has chosen to help Harvesters Community Food Network, a regional food bank serving northwestern Missouri and northeastern Kansas that assists more than 620 not-for-profit agencies.
• The Los Angeles and NYC Dads Groups will again help GOOD+ Foundation, a nonprofit group that works with a network of more than 100 community-based organizations across the country to distribute essentials to families in need.
• Madison Dads Group in Wisconsin will assist the Goodman Community Center, which helps income-limited families through a food pantry, before- and after-school programs and other services.
• Our Portland Dads Group will work with the Oregon Food Bank, a central hub for supplying food pantries across the entire Pacific Northwest state.
• San Francisco Dads Group has selected the SF-Marin Food Bank to be its partner. The nonprofit provides more than 100,000 meals a day through 250 area food pantries.
• Twin Cities Dads Group in Minnesota will volunteer with Second Harvest Heartland, one of the nation’s largest food banks.

“At Plum, our mission is to nourish little ones with the very best food from the very first bite. Back in 2013, we founded The Full Effect® program to extend our mission to little ones in need. In America, 1 in 5 children is food insecure. That’s approximately 13 million kids,” Mandy Geisler, senior marketing manager at Plum Organics, said in a written statement. “The global giving movement Giving Tuesday is a great platform to raise awareness about this issue. By partnering with City Dads Group again this year, we’re able to bring organic baby food donations to organizations in twelve of their locations nationwide.”

City Dads Group members and others who are not able to participate in any of these events in person can follow our work on Twitter and Instagram. By using hashtags #PlumParents and #GivingTuesday, you can see pictures of our dads across the country supporting families in need.

Giving Tuesday is a global day of outreach dedicated to helping others. It’s meant to kick-off the holiday season and inspire people to collaborate in improving their local communities. Since its 2012 inception, tens of thousands of organizations worldwide annually participate in the day.

This will be the fourth consecutive year City Dads outposts around the country have participated in Giving Tuesday activities, and the second that Plum Organics has served as our national sponsor.

DISCLOSURE: Plum Organics is partnering with City Dads Group for the Giving Tuesday work mentioned above through a donation of goods and financial compensation.

What is old is new again in Kansas City as a 15-year-old organization for fathers has joined the City Dads Group network.

The Kansas City Dads Group started online in 2002 as Kansas City Dads At-home Daily, or KCDADS, to bring together at-home dads — by choice or circumstance, their children and families in the Kansas/Missouri metro area. By the end of the decade, the group had more than 80 families on their roster.

After being quiet for the past several years, KCDADS leaders decided to try to reinvigorate their organization by joining forces with City Dads Group earlier this year, making it our 26th chapter in the United States.

You can find the Kansas City Dads Group on these social media channels:

• Meetup (go here to join the group)
• Facebook
• Twitter
• Instagram

The group will have two co-organizers:

• Tucker Smith of Independence, Mo.,  is an at-home father of three, two elementary-school aged boys and a 2-year-old girl.
• Brandon Billinger of Lenexa, Kan., is a former public television producer with two children , ages 6 and 1. He writes the blog, The Rookie Dad.

Founded in November 2008 in New York City as a way a handful of fathers could arrange playdates and outings with their children, the organization went national in 2014.